


Reflections of you

by capture_your_dreams



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Baby Shoma, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Smut, M/M, Miscommunication, Mpreg, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:41:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28013349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/capture_your_dreams/pseuds/capture_your_dreams
Summary: When Yuzuru thought that his life was perfect, everything changes when a little mistake turns into his new reason to smile
Relationships: Javier Fernández/Yuzuru Hanyu
Comments: 5
Kudos: 32





	1. Sparks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooo this is a translation of my story *which is in spanish* so i'm sorry if there's any mistake bc i'm not used to write in english:( 
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Yuzu is 17 in this chapter and Javi 20 but there’s nothing explicit. Also, the story is set 3 years before Sochi

The cold wind hit this face while the blades of his skates slid through the ice. He had spent days trying to perfect his quad salchow and he was sure that if he practiced the enough, he would be able to nail it in his next competition.

He was able to do the four revolutions, feeling proud of himself even though he landed with his whole body instead of doing it with his right foot. The very known pain invaded him immediately but that didn’t keep him from laughing at his mistake. He was so tired that he didn’t even got up and simply stayed laying face down on the ice, trying to catch his breath.

It was matter of seconds when his training mate was in front of him.

“Are you okay, Yuzu?” Javier asked, giving out his hand to help him to get up. He didn’t doubt in taking it, but when he was standing, Javier didn’t let go and instead of that he pulled him to his body, drowning him into a hug.

The show of affection didn’t went unnoticed by the others skaters as it was still so strange to see them together and any of them could take their eyes off the couple.

It was really incredible to see how Yuzuru went from being the new weird kid that carried a pooh tissue box everywhere to be the only person to catch the attention from the raising spaniard skater. Even when he first moved to Toronto, Brian feared that they wouldn’t get along because they were so different, so it was a great surprise to see how the two of them fell in love day by day.

Everything had started when Yuzuru asked Javier for helped for his jump combination, and from then on not only his technique improved but a friendship was born. In the beginning the language barrier was a big problem for both of them, but with time they started to understand each other through their heavy accents and didn’t even needed words to do it. And until now, Javier was the only one that could fully understand Yuzuru’s broken english.

Even tough things went slow in the beginning, it was matter of time until the japanese stopped being shy and started to feel more comfortable with physical contact, especially if it was Javier. Like now, that he took advantage of the fact that their coach wasn’t looking at them and let the spaniard take his waist to kiss him. Yuzuru didn’t wanted to let go but he had to when he heard Brian yelling.

“Javier, let Yuzu alone and go back training!” he ordered, making the japanese laugh, ashamed to the fact that his training mates heard his coach words.

“ _Ya voy, mamá_ *”. Javier sighed before leaving a small kiss on his boyfriend’s lips. “See you later _hermoso*_ ”.

With that Javier skated away, making him giggle. The spaniard was the only one capable of making him so happy with such small things.

Yuzuru decided to follow his boyfriend’s actions and went back to training without stop looking at him from time to time.

* * *

When both of them finished their training, they walked to their home like every day with their hands locked together. Recently both lived together in Javier’s apartment thanks to the time when Yuzuru’s mother had to go back to Japan due to a family emergency, and Yuzuru, not wanting to be alone, accepted his boyfriend’s solution to live together in the meantime that his mother was out of the country. But when the day to say goodbye arrived neither of them wanted to let go because now their relationship was going a lot better thanks to the fact that they got a lot more time to see each other apart from training. And after Javier begged for weeks, Yumi finally accepted and Yuzuru was able to stay with him. And now Javier could be by his side even when he was busy studying, and even though he couldn’t help him with any of his homework, he was always there to support Yuzuru when things got too complicated.

It was a day like any other, and in the meantime that Yuzuru was studying, Javier was cooking dinner, and when it was ready, Yuzuru was already done with all of his responsibilities for the day.

When they finished eating, each one called their family to updated them on their life’s, and after a threat from Yumi to the spaniard about taking care of Yuzuru, they decided to watch a movie. 

But Yuzuru, instead of watching the tv in front of him, was admiring Javier. A year already passed since the spaniard asked him to be his boyfriend, and it was still so surprising how he could make his day better with just a smile. Yuzuru rested his head on his boyfriend’s shoulder and found himself smiling when Javier hugged his waist with his strong arms.

Yuzuru wanted to stay like this forever, because he really loved how his life was at the moment. But to his and Javier’s bad luck, their whole world would change thanks to the little baby growing in his body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ya voy, mamá*: I'm going, mom  
> hermoso*: beautiful


	2. We’ll care about nothing real

[Smallpools - Karaoke](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3zpFDvst5M)

The beginning of the end of his life as he knew it started with an inexplicable tiredness in his training. Yuzuru didn’t understand why he couldn’t perform his complete programs without having to stop in the middle or why he ate like a starving man after every training. And even if he was worried about his current situation, he couldn’t dare to tell anyone, not even Javier, he didn’t want to worry him because he thought it was only the stress of being so close to the start of the season. 

As he tried in vain to complete his program he heard Brian yelling at him to stop. The both knew that if he kept going on like this he wouldn’t win the NHK Trophy, and he couldn’t afford that when his career was growing so much after his world record at Skate America. He had to win his next competitions if he wanted to qualify for the Grand Prix, but with the pace he was running it would be impossible.

“Yuzu, have you been following your diet?” his coach asked, making him feel confused. Without knowing the reason for his question, he replied with a nod, even though it was a lie. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sorry” he murmured ashamed at being discovered. 

“Yuzuru, you know you have to follow it to maintain your performance. If you don’t, it will bring consequences, you have even already gained weight”.

His words made him look and touch his stomach involuntarily; he didn’t notice any difference, although apparently he was the only one who didn’t, because now that he thought about it, his training partners had been watching him more than normal. And although at first he thought it was because of his sudden low level of performance, it was actually because of his physical change. Luckily for him, before he had to think of anything to get out of the awkward situation his coach had put him in, Javier skated towards them, making all the stress he had from not being able to do his best in his program disappeared when he saw his smile.

“Is everything for today?” Javier asked, referring to the training. Unlike Yuzuru, he had made a big progress in his free program, correcting most of his mistakes of the past competition.

Brian just nodded, dismissing them, but not before giving Yuzuru one last warning look.

* * *

Maia and Alex had gone to Toronto for a week to train with Jeff Buttle to polish their choreography. And even though Yuzuru was not as close to the Shibutani brothers as Javier was, he had agreed to pick them up at the airport and spend time with them when their training was over.

At that moment he was with his boyfriend driving to the airport, and as soon as they got there they didn’t had to wait long till they found Maia and Alex. And when they were in front of them, Yuzuru couldn't help but cling to Javier when he noticed that the oldest of the Shibutani was recording. They both greeted the camera and Alex said a few words towards it before turning it off.

“Yuzu, Javi! It's been so long since we saw you!” Maia said, finally being able to hug the couple. The two didn’t hesitate to reciprocate her hug and then did the same with Alex.

The couple were so excited to see them again that neither of them noticed the stares the Japanese was receiving from the Shibutani brothers, not even when they lagged a bit behind them to speak.

“Do you notice something different in Yuzu?” Maia whispered just loud enough for her brother to hear.

“Yes, but I don’t know what it is, he just… look different” he said, and with that they made an agreement to keep it between themselves and not say anything to either of the two skaters who looked naïve to this.

* * *

The four friends were freely skating on the Cricket Club rink, and to the bad luck of their coaches and choreographers, none of them paid attention to their orders. And if it weren't because they had already trained for two hours in a row they would be in trouble. But thanks to their hard work, Brian and Jeff allowed them to relax a little bit, which they hadn't done in a long time.

Maia took this opportunity to record a little bit for the vlog that would go up on the channel she shared with her brother. At first she had only dedicated to skate slowly while talking to the camera about what they had done since they had landed in Toronto, but seeing how Yuzuru and Javier skated hand in hand next to her, she had a brilliant idea.

“Yuzu, Javi!” she called, drawing the attention of the skaters. “Would you kiss for the camera?”

Yuzuru immediately denied, feeling his face turn red at her friend's request.

“Please! It’s for the vlog” she begged, and at this Javier took his boyfriend by the waist, whispering something in his ear that couldn’t be captured by the camera but which made Yuzuru smile widely before the Spaniard joined their lips in a delicate kiss.

They were without a doubt the cutest couple Maia has ever seen.

* * *

The four of them had decided to go out for dinner to catch up on what had happened in their lives, and at Alex and Javier's pleas they went to a karaoke bar. And although Yuzuru had initially suggested meeting at his and Javier apartment since the idea of watching a movie or playing video games sounded more tempting than going out to a bar when he didn’t even drink alcohol, he found himself having one of the best nights of his life, and without knowing, the last one where he laughed and joked without worrying.

Considering that they only saw each other twice a year if they were lucky, there was never a lack of conversation topic, not even when Javier left Yuzuru alone with Maia as he walked away to sing with Alex. The Japanese skater really liked to talk to her, because even though she could be funny and make him laugh for hours, she was also quite mature, something that apparently only she had in the small group of friends.

“How are things with Javi?” Maia asked to make conversation, not knowing that she had just made a big mistake.

From there it was a combination of English and Japanese that she couldn’t understand, but even so she didn’t stop Yuzuru when she saw how excited and happy he seemed talking about Javier. Luckily, she didn't had to spend a lot of time trying to figure out what her friend wanted to say because his boyfriend interrupted them to invite him to sing with him.

Maia couldn't help but laugh when she saw how her brother and Yuzuru tried in vain to sing in Javier's mother tongue. Without being able to resist, she took out her cell phone and started recording; that would definitely be on the vlog. When the song ended, the three of them returned to their table and watched the video Maia had recorded, unable to help but laugh at the ridicule they had made.

Everything was perfect, or so Yuzuru thought until his entire world began to spin, causing the smell of food and alcohol around him to make his stomach turn up.

“Are you okay?” Javier asked at his side, and when he turned around to answer, he felt how that simple action worsened his nausea.

“Yes, I just… I feel kind of dizzy” he said, trying to minimize his discomfort, but before his boyfriend could even ask him if he was sure, he had to run to the bathroom.

Javier didn’t hesitate to follow him, and although he was not the only one worried about the young Japanese skater, Maia's concern went beyond her brother and Javier’s worries; she was beginning to understand what was going on with Yuzuru and she didn't like it at all.


	3. If you love me don't let go

[X Ambassadors - Unsteady](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0lw3qylVfY)

When his sudden dizziness didn’t stop Yuzuru decided to go to the doctor, worried that it was something serious. At first Javier planned to go with him even if he also missed his training day, but after Maia insisted that she wanted to accompany Yuzuru, it was she who was at the Japanese side while they waited for their consultation turn.

To try to make time pass faster and forget about his nerves caused by the fear of having something serious, Yuzuru asked Maia for her cell phone to distract himself for a bit, but as soon as he entered her social networks, the comments of the last vlog didn’t take long to appear. Every one of them insulted him for having gained weight, and he didn't understand why people were so cruel with their words; now he remembered why he had no social network.

“Don’t read that stuff” Maia said, trying in vain to take the cell phone from him when she saw what he was seeing. Yuzuru ignored her and kept reading the comments, and when her friend finally managed to snatch her cell phone, every one of the people's insults was etched in his mind. 

“Do you think I don't deserve to be with Javi because I'm fat?” he asked, repeating the words he had just read. Maia didn’t have a chance to respond as his friend was called to come in for the consultation, but she promised herself that she would speak to him after the appointment.

When they just sat down in the chairs in front of the desk of the doctor who would attend them, he couldn't help but want to leave. This was definitely not his day and to that would be added discovering what his constant discomfort was due to. All he wanted was to go back to his apartment and spend the rest of the afternoon with his boyfriend, but unfortunately it wouldn't be like that.

The appointment started as he expected; the doctor asked him about his symptoms and if he had done anything out of his routine lately, but when he answered no to the latter, the doctor expression changed noticeably.

“Yuzuru, have you had unprotected sex recently?” the doctor asked seriously. The Japanese was ashamed to answer with his friend by his side, but he still nodded lowering his gaze. At that time Maia wanted to hit the Japanese for being so irresponsible. 

“Do you follow any contraceptive method?”

“Uh, yes, I take the pill”.

“Do you take it every day?”

“Yes” he said, but because of the insecurity with which he had done it, it sounded more like a question, and that made both women stare at him. But it wasn't his fault; he was a very busy person and between his training and studies it was impossible for him to take care of everything. Also, there was no problem if he forgot to take the pill for a day or two, right?

“Okay, since I can't be completely sure what you have I’ll request a blood test” the doctor said, handing him the order for this one. The doctor couldn't help feeling sorry for the Japanese; he looked so young and she knew beforehand that he was a skater, and if she was correct, it would be a shame to see his full potential go to waste because of his irresponsibility.

Yuzuru accepted the sheet, reading it immediately. The address where the studies would take place was of a maternity clinic.

* * *

By the time Javier got home, his boyfriend was supposed to be there already, but when he called him he got no answer; the apartment was completely silent, and that wasn’t normal. He walked to the room he shared with the Japanese, and as soon as he opened the door, he found his boyfriend lying on the bed, with the covers completely covering his body.

“Yuzu? Are you okay?” he asked, approaching him and uncovering his head only to see how tears were streaming down the Japanese's cheeks.

“I’m so sorry, Javi” Yuzuru muttered in a cracked voice, making the Spaniard's concern grow even more.

“What happened?”

The answer he got was his boyfriend's shaking hand handing him the order for the blood test. Yuzuru didn't have to say more for the Spaniard to understand. Javier didn't know what to say; his mind was blank and his only reaction was to cling to the Japanese as if his life depended on it.

“I’m scared, Javi” he admitted, feeling a bit calmer being in his boyfriend's arms.

“Everything will be fine" he said, even though he himself didn't believe it.

* * *

This time Javier had accompanied him to his appointment, and no one but them and Maia knew the real reason why they wouldn’t go to train that day. Her friend had promised not to tell anyone about the possible status of Japanese with the condition that they’d call her to update her on everything that happened when she couldn’t be with them because she had to return to the United States.

Both Yuzuru and Javier couldn’t sleep until the day the studies were to be done, and when the entire procedure was finally over, they only had to wait a few hours, and that was the worst part. Because the very idea that their future would be decided by the results of the blood test made their stomachs turn.

When it was finally time to collect the results, neither of them could calm down. To Yuzuru everything seemed so far away; it was as if his body acted on its own and his mind was elsewhere. He saw his boyfriend take an envelope from the clinic receptionist.

None of them dared to open it until they were inside the car, and when they finally did it, they felt as if the world around them was collapsing. The test had come back positive.

He was pregnant.

Neither of them said anything on way back to the apartment.

* * *

Yuzuru didn't know how long he had been crying but by then he felt like his head was going to explode and his eyes were burning. Since he had arrived he had locked himself in their room while Javier was in the living room even worse than him.

The Spaniard couldn't help but feel guilty, because when he was already twenty, Yuzuru was just a boy. How had he taken advantage of him in such a way? He kept repeating over and over how stupid he had been, but he stopped himself as he realized that no matter how many times he insulted or scold himself in his head, his problem wouldn’t go away. He had made a mistake, one that could cost his boyfriend his figure skating career, but he had to be strong and face the consequences even though the only thing he wanted to do was to turn back on time.

Meanwhile Yuzuru couldn't contain his sobs; it felt like his lungs weren't working properly and the oxygen wasn’t enough. Everything hurt. Thousands of questions crossed his mind, and each one was about what he would do, but none of them seemed to have an answer. And although he loved kids and his dream was to be a father one day, he didn’t expect that day to be so soon. Because while the Japanese planned to start a family when he retired from skating, now he would do it when he was just seventeen.

His dream had always been to win an Olympic medal, but with the recent news his goal seemed so far away that it hurt. He knew it had all been his and Javier's fault, but he still couldn't stop cursing the universe for being so cruel with him. It was as if everything he had fought for the last years of his life was fading in front of him.

It took a long time for either of them to calm down, and when that happened, Javier was the one who took the first step. He walked to the room where Yuzuru was and gently knocked the door. When he heard the broken voice of his boyfriend indicating that he could come in, he didn’t hesitate to do so. He walked to the bed and lay down next to the Japanese, and despite the fact that they were facing each other, neither of them dared to look up. They were both terrified of the future, but they knew they had to talk, whether they wanted to or not.

“What are we going to do?” Javier asked, breaking the silence that had formed in the room.

“I don’t know” the Japanese answered honestly. And seeing how he didn’t stop shaking, his boyfriend pulled him to his body, hugging him tightly.

"I'll support you in everything, you know?" The Spanish began, and his words had never been so sincere before. “If you decide to have it, I’ll be by your side at all times, and if not, too. We're in this together”.

The room fell silent again, but now the silence was comforting because of the fact that Javier refused to let go of his boyfriend.

Yuzuru knew that he had to think very well what they would do, but there was a decision that he had already made and he wasn’t thinking of changing it; he would have his baby. Because, although it wasn’t the moment that he would have wanted to become a father, he couldn’t even think about getting rid of his baby when he already knew the consequences of having sex with his boyfriend could bring and had ignored them.

“I want to have it” he said, surprising himself with how confident he sounded when inside he felt like he was going crazy.

“Are you sure?” Javier asked, astonished at how his boyfriend was willing to put his future and health at risk by having his baby. Yuzuru nodded, drying his tears; he was more than sure of his decision and wouldn’t let anything or anyone change his mind.

“Okay, then we’ll do it. We’ll have a baby together” Javier said, and the words sounded so strange and unfamiliar to both him and Yuzuru, but they’d have to get used to the idea that they would be parents.

Now they just had to tell the news and their decision to their parents and coach. But of course, that was easier said than done.


	4. I'm losing a piece of me

[Troye Sivan - HEAVEN](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VNV__mV38s)

One of the hardest things Yuzuru had to do was take up enough courage to tell his coach that he had made what would probably be the worst mistake of his life. Ever since he had come to the Cricket Club a year ago, Brian had been like a father to him, someone who was with him even in his worst days. And telling him that he’d retire for a while scared him; he didn’t want to disappoint him, but now that no longer mattered, not when he was sure he would.

He and Javier had told Brian that they needed to talk with him, and now they were on their way to his office at the Cricket Club. At first it all seemed like a bad dream, but it wasn't, they were really about to change their lives completely.

When they were seated in front of Brian's desk, neither dared to start, so Brian decided to do it himself when he realized that the both boys were too nervous to even articulate a sound.

"What did you wanted to talk about?" He asked, and concern could be heard in his voice. He hadn't wanted to get too involved in the personal issues of his pupils so he didn’t pressure them, but the fact that they started skipping training and Yuzuru's health suddenly deteriorated made him raise his suspicions that something bad was going on. And although he wished he was, he wasn’t wrong.

"We have something to tell you," Javier said, pausing for the Japanese to continue, but he seemed to be on the verge of fainting.

"I, uhm ... I'm ..." he began, but the words seemed to be stuck in his throat, making him feel like he was choking. He felt Javier taking his hand in his, trying to comfort him.

He took a deep breath and rearranged his thoughts in a desperate attempt to break the news to Brian and get out of this awkward situation.

"I'm pregnant," he finally said, and with those simple words he saw his coach’s face go from disbelief to disappointment and anger.

Brian didn't know what to say to his pupils; He knew they both had a talent for skating, and seeing how they wasted this made him want to yell at them until they came to their senses. But that wouldn't do any good anymore, and for a moment he wondered if it had been a good thing after all that Javier and Yuzuru had gotten along so well even before training together. Perhaps the best thing would have been if he had never accepted the Japanese as his pupil, but he had, and now he had his two best skaters, both with bright futures ahead, practically crying in front of him as if that would solve what they had done.

"Please say something," Javier said, breaking the silence that had formed in the room. The waiting was killing him and although he had a slight idea of what his coach would say, he really wanted to know what he was thinking.

"I'm disappointed in both of you," Brian admitted, having to shut up part of what he was really thinking; both boys were in a very bad shape and it wouldn't do any good to scold them. “You’re both so young and have so many possibilities. I expected more from you.”

Although it had been much less serious than Yuzuru and Javier expected, the words of their coach hurt, but they didn’t say anything because they knew they deserved it.

"Do you know what you will do?" Brian asked after a few seconds of absolute silence.

"I'll be retiring for a while to have our baby," Yuzuru announced, fearing that his coach would be against his decision. But the reality was that this didn’t impress Brian, because he expected them to do that from the moment they gave him the news.

"You know you can count on me for whatever it is, yeah?" Brian said, giving both of them a small pat on the shoulder. “And when all this is over, I hope to see you here training again, Yuzu”.

Those last words made the Japanese smile, because they meant that Brian believed in them. And even though they knew it would be difficult, they were sure they’ll make it.

* * *

No one knew exactly how it happened, but even though Yuzuru and Javier wanted to keep the fact that they’d have a baby together as a secret while they got used to the idea, the news seemed to spread like wildfire. Maybe someone overheard their talk in Brian's office or had noticed Yuzuru's absence and strange behavior at the Cricket Club. Whatever the reason was it didn't matter anymore, what it did was that now the whole world of figure skating knew that the future star of Japan was expecting a child from the famous Spaniard skater with whom he trained.

And although lately everything seemed to be going wrong, Yuzuru couldn’t suppress the feeling of frustration at seeing how another problem was added to the ones he already had. Why couldn't anything turn out right? And as if it wasn't enough that everyone around him looked at him and Javier with pity, everything had gotten worse when he received a call from his parents demanding that he tell them that all the rumors about him being pregnant were a lie. But he hadn't been able to do it. And with that his family was traveling to Toronto at the time.

He had to admit that he had never felt so terrified before in his entire life; his parents had given him all their trust, even to the point of letting him live with his boyfriend despite his young age. But still he had wasted the freedom they had given him and there was nothing he could do but hope he didn't disappoint them that much. Although that would be impossible considering everything they had done so that he could train in Canada.

When the day finally came when his parents were supposed to arrive in Toronto, he hadn't been able to sleep or eat because of the nerves. Because if he thought that the problems he already had were too much, facing his parents would make them seem like nothing.

As the time for his family to go to his apartment drew near, he felt fear invaded him. He felt Javier's arms wrap his body, forcing him to stop moving; He hadn't even realized that he was trembling.

"Calm down, everything will be okay," Javier said, trying in vain to calm him. Yuzuru tried to listen to his boyfriend and calm down, but the sound of the doorbell made all his nerves return and he practically ran to the door, but before opening it he had to take a deep breath to mentally prepare himself for what was to come.

And although Yuzuru expected his parents to be angry with him, he hadn’t expected their anger to be that much. It had all started relatively well, but it had ended with the people he loved the most telling him dozens of insults that he could have expected from anyone other than them.

Javier watched everything from his side, but didn’t dare to say anything. He could only hear how Yuzuru's parents told him how disappointed they were of him and how he couldn’t count on them again at all. But from one moment to the next the discussion turned into screams in Japanese and English that he found it hard to understand, although just seeing how his boyfriend didn't stop crying gave him an idea of the meaning of the words that were said to him.

The Spaniard couldn't believe that Yuzuru's family had reacted so badly. Because, although his parents had also given him the scolding of his life, it hadn’t gone from being something more than a Skype conversation with a few screams and curses that ended with an emotional talk in which he and his parents cried. Fortunately, everything had ended with his family telling him that they’d support him in everything he needed, but now he didn’t believe that this would also happen with Yuzuru's parents. In fact, everything seemed to be going so horribly that he was tempted to take his boyfriend away so that he’d stop hearing those hurtful words. But he didn’t. Instead, he stayed by his side until his parents seemed to calm down.

"Your sister give up her dreams for you, and that's how you thank her, ruining everything for a boy?" Javier managed to hear Yuzuru's father say, and even when the words weren't directed at him, they hurt.

It really hurt to see how Yuzuru begged for his parents' forgiveness through his broken voice and uncontrolled sobs that came from his throat, but he couldn't do anything. He knew better than to meddle, not when he was sure the Japanese's parents now hated him for ruining their son's future.

And if Javier felt bad listening to the discussion, all Yuzuru wanted was to disappear at that moment. He had always tried to make his parents proud and they had a good relationship, but now all of that was gone.

When his father seemed to have finished, there was still his mother, who had hardly said anything and now found herself looking at him in a way that made him feel like the worst person in the world.

“Why?” It was all she said, and Yuzuru couldn't answer, because even he didn't know the answer. Why had he allowed that to happen? Why had he neglected his future so much when he had fought so hard to be one of the best skaters? Why had he done it when he knew the consequences of his actions?

"I'm sorry," Yuzuru murmured, because even though he'd said that phrase hundreds of times that day, it didn't seem to be enough.

His answer wasn’t enough for his parents. And without saying more, they both left the apartment, completely disappointed in who was once their greatest pride.

At that moment everything seemed to fall apart for Yuzuru; His family had always been the most important thing in his life, but now they wanted nothing to do with him. He could do nothing more than accept the hug from his boyfriend, who was at his side supporting him.

"They hate me, Javi," he sobbed, hating himself for ruining all the good things he ever had in life.

"They don't hate you, they just need time," the Spaniard assured, but Yuzuru couldn't believe his words.

That night the only thing Javier could do was hold his boyfriend, who didn’t stop crying until he fell asleep.


End file.
